March 9, 2020

Dear Dad,

I'm going to use this as a reflective journal from now on. I want to heal and this is apparently part of a self-care plan.

I miss you every day. Things have been hard and I miss being able to call you for a good laugh. I'm still so angry that we lost you the way we did. I'm glad I was there to hold your hand at the end. I love you so much.

I'm still going to therapy, sort of. Bad weather and jostled scheduling makes it so I've only been able to attend one group therapy session so far. I'm still not sure if I like it. I think I prefer one on one sessions but my therapist wants me to be more social. I hate it.

I'm back on my meds again. Starting them up is never fun, but what can you do?

It's after midnight, so now it's March 10. Dad, I wish I could see you. I have pictures and some videos but it'll never be enough. You're always in my heart and I want to make you proud but it's hard to stop hurting and move past the pain. I'm trying though.

Love you so much, Daddykins.

~Chrissy

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